A Gift You Give Yourself


Can you believe it? We are “over the hump,” more than half-way to the best Valentine’s Day ever, regardless of what anyone else does or doesn’t do!

Day 5: Forgive

Most everyone realizes the importance of forgiveness when there is a big mistake or serious hurt, but do you know that the little hurts can add up to be just as big a problem over time?

Think about someone you love and care about who has hurt you, whether it’s one big thing or a lot of little ones.

Ask yourself if you are ready to forgive. Forgiveness is not about whether the other person deserves it. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that it was ok for the other person to hurt you, nor does it remove consequences. And forgiveness is certainly not about putting yourself in a position to be hurt again.

Nelson Mandela suffered years of unjust imprisonment and learned first-hand that “Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping it will kill your enemies.” When he was finally released, he said, “As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew that if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.”

Make it real. When you are ready to forgive, if it feels safe, tell the other person in whatever way feels right to you that you forgive them with no strings attached. If it is not a good idea to talk to them, make a tangible record to remind yourself that you chose to forgive.

Cheering you along,


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