In August 2005, I was at my sister’s house listening to her advice about finding a wife (my first wife had passed away). I wasn’t really paying attention when she dragged me to her computer and signed me up for a dating service. After filling out the form she said, “Give me your credit card!” I obeyed and two days later I heard from Anne.
It was Saturday about mid-morning when I read Anne’s comment and promptly responded sparking an Internet discussion lasting all afternoon.
About 7:00 p.m. I invited her to dinner. She agreed to meet me at my favorite restaurant but when we got there we learned it was closed for the week. I suggested an alternative restaurant that I liked but it really wasn’t a place for a first date.
Nevertheless, we had a great time. In fact, we enjoyed ourselves so much we lost track of the time until noticing we were the only ones left in the restaurant. We apologized to the employees and quickly left.
After we married we both learned the rest of the story about that date. When I suggested this restaurant Anne thought I was joking and nearly laughed but didn’t because she noticed I was serious.
I was also able to explain why I choose this restaurant. At the time of our first date I was doing some work on my house and I just paid tuition for my son and me all with my credit card. I was not sure if my card would be accepted or rejected. I didn’t want to go someplace that wouldn’t take a check and embarrass myself if my credit card was rejected. I selected a restaurant I knew would take my check.
While this restaurant was nice but not fancy Anne didn’t judge me rather she trusted me, accepted my decision, and had a good time. We can help our children by helping them accept others for who they are and not base their judgment on inaccurate perceptions.
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