Dumb Horse or Dumb Boys?

It was a beautiful, hot, summer afternoon in Afton, Wyoming when I went horseback riding with Roger and Gary, two of my cousins. We only had one horse and we were riding bareback. I always thought that horse was the dumbest horse I ever rode.

I don’t remember whose idea it was to ride that horse, but it was a lousy idea. I guess it really doesn’t matter whose idea it was because I kept getting back on of my own volition, even after falling off several times.

This horse only had two speeds: run and stop. As soon as we hopped on, it started running and didn't slow down until it came to a fence, then it stopped suddenly, and we fell off.

We thought that was fun, so we picked ourselves up and jumped back on. Like the first time, it took off running and didn't stop until we came to another fence and guess what? Same results.

We were having fun riding and falling off that horse until we realized it was getting late and we needed to get back to the barn to do our chores. As we approached the barn, I knew that we would be hitting the ground again and sure enough we did. This time the ground was much harder and unforgiving than the pasture. When I stood up, I couldn’t bend my arm and so my grandmother had to take me to the Star Valley Hospital to have surgery on my dislocated elbow.

The next morning, I woke up and noticed the cast on my right arm and Grandma Cazier sitting in my room waiting to take me to her house where she became my supervising nurse. I must admit that she understood boys and she had a natural and sophisticated radar system in her head. During my recovery period she kept track of my moves wherever I went, whether I was on her farm, my uncle’s farm, or anywhere else in Star Valley.

I learned two important lessons from this experience. First, my grandmother loved me, and all the discipline she gave me during that time (I thought I was being tortured) was being done because she knew what was best for me, and she monitored me to keep me safe from myself.

The second thing I learned was that she realized that kids (especially her grandsons) were going to take risks. She raised two farm boys and realized that it came with the territory. But I learned a valuable lesson that day. Sometimes risk taking can have unwanted results but we can learn from our mistakes.

The thing is risk taking is normal and we need to encourage our children to take risks (perhaps not riding a horse with just two speeds bareback) but taking risks that challenge our kids and push them to excellence. Taking an AP class, trying out for a solo part in the school play. or speaking up in class all involve a risk and whether our kids earn college credit, get the part, or make their point in class, our children can grow from taking healthy risks.

As parents we can help our children learn to evaluate risks and benefits and help them understand that we ALWAYS have their best interests in mind as they step out and learn to make their own choices.

So, help me answer this question, “Was it a dumb horse or dumb boys?”

Happy Failing Forward,

Calvert Cazier