Grandpa, His Grandson and Two Trees

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A short time ago I was lying in bed trying to decide whether I wanted to get up and start my day or if I wanted to keep lying there and pretend to be productive. While in this contemplative mood I picked up my phone and started scrolling through Facebook. Of course, when I do this, I usually put off my decision about getting out of bed for a few minutes and this particular morning was no different. 


I guess this would be the dictionary definition of procrastination but let me add a slight caveat to this assumption. I don’t consider it to be procrastination if whatever is prolonging my action is a positive and beneficial exercise in self-improvement. And this is exactly what was happening on this particular morning.


I got sidetracked by some advice a wise grandfather was sharing with his grandson. I don’t know who wrote about this incident nor do I know whether it is even true. All I know is as a grandfather myself it resonated with me.


It seems that on this particular day the grandfather was outside working in his garden when his grandson paid him a visit. He just wanted to hang out and spend the day with his grandfather, who happened to think that it was a great idea. The conversation eventually got around to life in general and the grandson wondered aloud what it takes to be successful. This wise grandfather thought for a few moments and then without answering the question right away he turned to his grandson and asked, “Would you like to go to the store with me?”


So, the two hopped into the family car and drove to the nursery where grandpa bought two trees (if this grandfather was like my grandfather, he would have also stopped at the ice cream store on the way home for a little treat). 


After they got home, they planted the trees. They planted the first one in a pot and put it in the house where it would be watered every day and get plenty of sunlight. They planted the second tree in the backyard in a special spot that also received lots of sun and sufficient water.


After both were planted the grandfather asked, “My boy, which of these two trees do you think will have the greatest success living healthy and being strong?”


Immediately the grandson responded, “The tree in the house!” To which the grandfather simply said, “We’ll see!” and the topic was dropped.


The grandson did not live in the same town as his grandfather. It was several years later when these two got together again and the subject of the two trees was mentioned. 


By now the grandson was 14-15 years old and as he and his grandfather were just lounging around the house just enjoying being together, the grandfather brought up the subject of the two trees. He asked his grandson if he remembered the question he asked so long ago about success. 


The boy did and so the grandfather explained that he could now answer his question and reminded his grandson of his answer at the time the tree planted in the pot and put in the house would be most successful in living healthy and being strong. Together, they visited the two trees. 


The one they planted in the house was indeed healthy and strong, but it was limited by its environment. Its roots were confined to the clay pot, which would hinder it from ever reaching its full potential. 


Then they walked to the backyard and looked at the second tree that was purchased and planted on the same day. This tree had grown taller than the one in the house, its trunk was much thicker, and its branches were stronger. After observing both trees the grandfather asked his grandson which tree he thought was more successful in reaching its full potential. It was obvious to the boy, “The one we planted outside!”


Then this wise grandfather asked one more simple but significant question, “Why do you think this happened?”


The boy hesitated and so the grandfather explained that while the tree in the house was well cared for and given everything it needed to survive, and it did succeed within the realm of its limited environment it never reached its full potential. The second tree flourished in a different way because it had an expansive environment and it also had to fight the wind, rain, cold, sun, animals, and man, all of which helped it become stronger.


Facing and overcoming our challenges can make us stronger, which helps lead us to success. Then the grandpa shared his great wisdom, “Now, son, please remember this! Success is not the same for everyone, nor are the rewards equal. Success is simply defined as accomplishing whatever our efforts have led us to achieve. Nothing more, nothing less!”


The boy thanked his grandfather and never forgot his lesson. 


From this story I believe that we can share a couple of lessons with our children.

  1. Challenges are necessary for us to grow and succeed in life.

 

  1. Self-confidence is built, quality of life is improved, and smiles are created as we meet our challenges head on and take control of our life.

 

  1. Those who let their challenges control them miss out on many of the true blessings and benefits of life.



As difficult as challenges can be they can also be great motivators for our life success. Let’s help our children recognize and adopt this valuable lesson in their lives.



Happy Failing Forward,


Calvert Cazier



PS Want to help your kids have less stress and more success at home and school? CLICK HERE to get a copy of our book, The Resiliency Toolkit: A Busy Parent’s Guide to Raising Happy, Confident, Successful Children.


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