Oops! I Did It Again!

The title of this post begs the question, “What exactly did I do again?” The answer is simple but before answering it I must ask myself a few simple questions. Question #1: “What’s the easiest thing you will ever do in your life? Answer: make a New Year’s resolution! Question #2: “What’s the most difficult thing to accomplish in one’s life?” Answer: Keeping that resolution! Question #3: “What is the purpose of making a resolution especially given the history that there is a 95% chance we will break it within 20 or 30 minutes after making it?” Answer: Beats me!


At the highest level of human behavior change most people convince themselves that it’s a good thing to try to change their behavior. They get all excited to adopt new strategies that will lead them to making changes, however, if they succeed at keeping their resolutions for perhaps 15 days, they will give themselves a certificate of accomplishment. It’s the same every year so why do we indulge ourselves in a proven system of failure? This is the question that has plagued humankind for thousands of years and yet we still make resolutions every year on January 1. We don’t seem to learn anything from our past failures.


Why is this? Is there some inner inertia digging at our conscience making us feel guilty if we don’t set a New Year’s goal for self-improvement? Do we forget the past and something temporarily blocks our memory and makes us believe that this year there really is hope that  we can improve our lives and make changes for the betterment of our future? Why can’t we remember the disasters we have all endured from the failures of our previous years resolutions?


I don’t know about you but for me personally I can’t think of a time when I actually kept a single one of my New Year’s resolutions. Probably if we are honest with ourselves most of us will admit having the same results as me. So why do we subject ourselves to the mental torture of feeling guilty for our lack of action when deep down we absolutely know that we are not going to keep them in the first place?


After expounding all this wisdom, I am telling you that I’m going to stop making New Year’s resolutions. I’m going to quit cold turkey and get rid of all the distracting resolution thoughts out of my mind. I’m going to start thinking of them as inappropriate thoughts and drive them to the gas station and dump them in the garbage can. I am through with this senseless activity that wastes time and creates irritable bowel syndrome. Never again will I make another New Year’s resolution. Now, what do you think of that?


I promise all of you, while standing in my shoes with holes in their soles, that I WILL NOT MAKE ANOTHER NEW YEAR’s resolution. This way I will not be suffering from any guilty conscience at the end of the year, and I will be able to honestly tell everyone that I feel great. Boy! Am I a genius or what?


Happy New Year!


P.S. Anne just reminded me that I already failed this New Year resolution business because I just made one. Dang! It didn’t even last 15 seconds.


Calvert Cazier