Scrap Of Paper
Recently I found a scrap of paper on which I had written, “It’s always darkest just before they turn on the lights.” I don’t know where it came from but I thought it might have a deep philosophical meaning to share with parents.
As I considered its message many memories were awakened involving several incidents when my sons enjoyed the light and others when they suffered through the dark. Both sons experienced success and failure in their athletic and academic endeavors and they were always rewarded for their efforts, sometimes with the sweet feeling that comes from winning and other times with the taste of defeat. It was easy to congratulate them and build them up when they won.
The challenging moments were the dark times of defeat or other disappointments. This is where I earned my title as ‘father’ by building them up so confidence was not destroyed. In these moments I had the opportunity to help them understand that things would get brighter if they didn’t give up on themselves.
I felt sorry for many of their friends whose parents didn’t understand this basic concept and became frustrated when their children didn’t win the game or get straight A’s. To help our children become the best they can become we must accept them for the honest effort they put forth and appreciate that no matter what happens they will always be winners in our eyes.
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Anne's Corner
As parents most of us want our children to flourish and reach for their dreams. We encourage them, tell them we believe in them, and urge them to set their aim high. We mean to be supportive and don't realize that at times this can actually be discouraging, even intimidating, if the message they hear is that we will be disappointed or think less of them if they try and fail. Fear of failure can then hold them back. Instead, try praising your child to taking a chance and for the effort and time they put in regardless of the outcome. Sincerely let them know that you are proud of them for taking a risk to give something they want a try, working hard at it, and sticking with it. And the truth is, that if they do this they can learn and grow from whatever happens, becoming stronger and more resilient in the process.
Anne's Corner
As parents most of us want our children to flourish and reach for their dreams. We encourage them, tell them we believe in them, and urge them to set their aim high. We mean to be supportive and don't realize that at times this can actually be discouraging, even intimidating, if the message they hear is that we will be disappointed or think less of them if they try and fail. Fear of failure can then hold them back. Instead, try praising your child to taking a chance and for the effort and time they put in regardless of the outcome. Sincerely let them know that you are proud of them for taking a risk to give something they want a try, working hard at it, and sticking with it. And the truth is, that if they do this they can learn and grow from whatever happens, becoming stronger and more resilient in the process. 