Sitting At Grandma’s Feet

I loved visiting Grandma Call and listening to her stories. I will share a few things I learned over the years while sitting at her feet. As I listened to her stories, she painted many pictures in my mind about her father flooding the pasture every winter to make an ice-skating pond for her family and friends. I could see grandma as a little girl skating on that pond laughing and playing and enjoying herself. I felt I was there when she described her family singing together and visiting with their neighbors while sitting on the front porch during the hot summer evenings. I enjoyed her telling me about playing night games with her friends. 

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When she was young, Saltaire was a popular resort built on the Great Salt Lake that families and young couples would frequent. It was 30 or 40 miles from where she lived. I learned about starting a courtship with grandpa. On at least one occasion they rode the old Bamberger Railroad to Saltaire to enjoy a swim in the lake, have a picnic, and a ride on the old rickety roller coaster.

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She told me about being a farmer’s wife in Wendell, Idaho. I learned about my mother’s birth in the farmhouse on the kitchen table and how frustrated she was with grandpa and the doctor. She explained that she kept calling them for help, insisting the baby was coming, but the doctor didn’t believe her and said, “No Mrs. Call, it will be a little longer,” and then went back to talking with Grandpa about pigs. This conversation ended when Grandma threatened to never forgive her husband if something happened to the baby. I don’t know if Grandpa ever lived that one down.

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I learned the details of how my mom’s head and face got burned by hot grease and I witnessed the pain and guilt that she still carried for more than 60 years as she described the accident. That evening, I gained a deeper appreciation of my mother’s struggles and triumphs. 

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From the lips of my grandmother, I learned a little about her history and from these experiences I gained appreciation for her and grandpa and their family. I felt the love and closeness of this family and recognized they could be mischievous, humorous, loving, and sometimes even quarrelsome. I recognized the love and concern the siblings had from my mother’s greatest struggle and the celebratory triumph she experienced as she slowly conquered her challenges. 

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The time I spent sitting at Grandma’s feet, listening to her stories helped instill gratitude in me for who I am and for my heritage. 

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Current research shows that sharing family history with our children helps them connect with their inner self and learn more about who they are. In addition, it helps them develop pride, confidence, self-esteem, and motivation to keep working towards the positive things in life. 

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Hearing family stories over and over again will help your children become more resilient when facing their own life challenges. Tell them about the fun times you experienced and your successes and be sure to include the stories about your hard times and your challenges. Let them learn about the mistakes you’ve made, your parents made, their aunts and uncles and cousins also made. 

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Why would you want to share these things? Because it gives you an opportunity to teach your children how they faced their problems, how they made repairs, how they moved forward. If you do this, your children will come to know at an unshakeable level that good things and bad things happen to everyone and that they belong to a family who is supportive and can find a way to overcome whatever happens. Your children need to hear stories about your real life and your real family. Start today. It only takes a minute. “Did I ever tell you about the time …?”  

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The tradition of telling family stories is one of the most powerful ways to help your children develop many of the resiliency skills research shows will prepare them to learn and grow from their own challenges. Through stories, you can help them appreciate the values you hold dear and why, learn wisdom from other people’s mistakes, appreciate the power of forgiveness to free them from suffering, understand the satisfaction of hard work and perseverance, and so much more.



Happy Failing Forward,


Calvert Cazier