Three Little Kisses

According to Cortney S. Warren, PhD., “… kissing is part of maintaining a bonded and attached romantic connection in most long-term relationships. … kissing frequency is also associated with increased general relationship satisfaction with their mate. … [it] also plays a larger role in spotlighting the emotional connection between partners.” theknot.com

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According to Dr. Warren and other marriage researchers and therapists, kissing your spouse is important in creating and maintaining a happy marriage (please note this is not the only thing). 

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For as long as I can remember, my parents had a daily ritual before dad went to work and again every evening when he came home. If he left again for a meeting their ritual would be repeated. This consisted of sharing “three little kisses”, which was one way they told each other “I love you!”

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Now these kisses were not the romantic, sensual ones that we see on television or in the movies. Rather, these kisses involved lightly touching each other’s lips which represented their deeper feelings of love, passion, greetings, peace, good luck, and enjoy your time until we meet again. 

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Besides the “three little kisses” that they shared daily for more than 55 years, my sisters and I noticed many other little expressions of love. These might have been imperceptible to other people but were not lost on us as their children. Such as the way Dad always treated Mom with gentleness and respect, and the way Mom responded and reciprocated his gentleness. 

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These simple acts illustrated to us the true love of parents. From their example of love and tenderness, respect and appreciation, thoughtfulness and kindness to each other, my three sisters and I learned that those “three little kisses” were really an intense expression of gratitude to be in each other’s life. We observed many instances where Dad sought Mom’s opinion and she felt comfortable expressing her true feelings knowing that he would respond with kindness as he listened to her advice.

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We witnessed these “three little kisses” frequently and each time we saw them express their love in this way we saw the depth and commitment of their love to each other. We also knew that we were fortunate to have parents who greatly loved one another and taught us the value of love and respect for our partners.  

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In fact, the night Mom parted from this earthly existence, as she was about to leave us, Dad leaned over the railing of her hospital bed and asked for a kiss. She opened her eyes long enough to give him “three little kisses,” letting him and their four children know for a certainty that her love for him was all encompassing and will last forever.

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Three little kisses is a tradition that several of Mom and Dad’s children along with their partners have adopted and still enjoy to this day.

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Simple little traditions such as “three little kisses” can provide many fond and happy memories creating important anchors in the future lives and relationships of our spouses and our children.



Happy Failing Forward,


Calvert Cazier